My partner and I finally got to attend a local event last weekend hosted by Kinky Salon at the Syrup Lounge. Kinky Salon is based in San Francisco but is currently on a "world tour" and we were in the city of their first stop.
The theme for the night was sexy pirate, and since I already had a bustle made I figured I would toss on some booty shorts, a peasant top, some boots and fishnets and call it an outfit. One thing I'm really glad I added were some crotchless fishnet tights. I didn't want to be trying to get them on and off during play, but I didn't want to lose the effect by forgoing them either.
Unlike previous play parties where my partner and I had hung back and watched a lot of the action, I was determined to be the first into the sex room so we could get a sexy vibe early on and potentially find some playmates. So shortly after arriving, we headed to the back room where I proceeded to give my partner a blowjob. We played and touched for a while before having sex (but no coming since it was early) and watched as other groups of people started to join us. There were some swinger couples, and a small orgy going on in the bed next to us. People were polite, made eye contact, but didn't linger, and overall we had fun playing in the room for about an hour.
At some point I started to get bored so I suggested we wander out and see what other sexy humans were out and about. Sadly we weren't making connections, and just when I was about to give up, a very cute blond woman started talking to my partner. Once I got her name, her partner monopolized me and started quizzing me on life and sex. One of the first things he asked me was if we were poly. I wasn't really sure if I should be annoyed or not that it was the second he asked me...
This went on for a while, me talking to the guy who very clearly high (which is a huge turn off for me) and this woman who apparently knew my husband, but wasn't bothering to engage with me. I kept debating if we should play with them, the guy had made it clear that they were poly and he was in to me. He was cute, had nice eyes, and I started wondering if he was a good kisser. I had my misgivings since I didn't love that this woman was ignoring me, but hey, we were at a sex party, I didn't feel like I could judge.
At some point the guy got really close, and that's when I realized he had terrible breath! I heard my brain say "nope, no way, not happening." I quickly did the math:
1. I don't like that he is high
2. I don't like that he has bad breath
3. I don't like that they are poly, and we aren't (different lifestyles)
4. I don't like that she has been engaging my partner, and has not talked to me at all (show me a little respect).
5. I don't like that she seems to be very immature
Everything added up to a huge turnoff, so at that point I encouraged my partner to come sit next to me so I could politely explain to him that I was tired and wanted to go home. It was an anticlimactic end to the evening, but I felt I got a lot of clarity:
1. When we swing, I want the woman that my partner is with to be someone that I like, preferably someone that I find attractive and get along with.
2. I don't want to be challenged right out of the gate by our first couple because she isn't sensitive enough to figure out that she has to talk to me.
3. I prefer people in a similar lifestyle or people that I know I can trust to not cross the lines of our rules.
4. I would prefer that the people we play with not have history, this woman was someone Morgan has known for six years, and I didn't love the idea of him hooking up with a friend of his, no matter how casual.
At the end of the day, I am grateful that I learned something and we had a god time playing with each other. And as an added bonus, the sex has been off the charts. I admit feeling a little competitive has made me try a little harder in bed. Plus, my husband can't stop fantasizing about me and the woman from the party having sex.